Over the course of a few months — heck, probably half of the year — I’ve been feeling less and less of the need to be consumed by social media. Now before I get into any sentimental details that comes with the year-end syndrome, this isn’t exactly going to be an in-depth analysis on how my year went. Nor will it be about stating the mighty obvious: resolutions and how I, realistically speaking, will never go about them. If anything, this year has been more about actually living a life beyond the screen of my computer or phone.

No, this isn’t the part where I make an Essena O’Neil reference and call my entire online life a lie and quit. It isn’t. And I won’t.

To put things into perspective, I’ve simply become less concerned over the strategising obsession that comes with social media — not just with instagram and not just with being an online influencer. I’m not talking about flat-lays (really, who would ever hate them?) or curating feeds. Or composing a 2-3 hard sell sentence for a photo caption. Although the latter does raise a few eyebrows, it’s actually way, way more deeper than that.

When faced with more than a 5-9 schedule coupled with priorities that hold higher than this digital space, I’ve finally come to terms with the fact that I was spreading myself too thin. As much as I want to juggle everything, I knew I was dealing with more than what I’ve bargained for.

When you’ve put 4 years into blogging and half of it being dedicated to more work than play, you encounter a great deal of things — networks, contacts and business proposals — that either surprise you zealously or simply leave you appalled. The ironic thing about the glamorous field that is the world of online and media is that not all is what it seems. Catfish is one shining example of just that. Regardless of what brand or who’s who, even the most lucrative seeming deal can be just as a joke as the clickbait on twitter. To accept the ones that you wholly support is one thing, but to fall victim to exploitation or succumbing to a pretentious online front just isn’t worth it in the long run.

With all that in mind, there comes a point when you become disillusioned, uninspired and you’re put in a position where taking a hiatus or leaving the blogosphere for good feels like the right choice. I won’t deny that one’s exponential online growth is something to rejoice about but ultimately this isn’t just about the statistics —the follower gain, the engagement or the profit. To end up being frantically obsessed over it will just leave you astray. I remind myself that this space shouldn’t conform to deadlines, instantaneous updates or aimless content. This blog will always remain to be my creative outlet and the direction I’m heading is more about creating a personal space — nothing forced, nothing rushed and nothing I’d have to sacrifice my integrity for. Thank you for those who have stood and supported my blog all throughout! Adios mi amigos and see you all in 2016!

Bea Marin

13 thoughts on “SYNTAX

  1. I find great admiration in this blog post. To be honest, you’re one of the bloggers who inspired me to make my own blog. I discovered your instagram account through my good friend, Sam Streeter. It’s nice to know that you’ll continue blogging. Looking forward to your next blog post!

  2. You do not only have a pretty face and a good sense of fashion, you’re also a pretty good writer. Love the looks and the choices of words, keep it up! ✨

  3. your lipstick is so pretty. mind telling where its from? 🙂 btw love your post been browsing your blog AGAIN haha

  4. I know this is kinda old for me to look at but I just wanted to let you know that you inspire me so much, especially concerning fashion. Now I want to be a blogger too! Do you mind if I ask which app do you use for editing your pictures? They’re just so gorgeous!

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